Amber (August)
It’s a date you never forget; it was June 22, 2015.
I was at work when the message came in that I had an update in my medical chart. I walked down the hallway to take the call and leaned against the wall as I spoke to the doctor. When I heard the word “cancer,” I remember just sliding to the floor and crying.
In that moment, my mind raced with fear. How bad is it? Am I going to die? I want to see my kids grow up. The fear and anxiety were overwhelming, not just for me, but for my family too. It’s a very scary time for everyone involved.
At first, I approached my diagnosis with positivity. I’ve always been a “cup half full” kind of person, so I thought, “I got this! Let’s GO! Fight like a girl!” But as the months wore on, the toll it took on me emotionally surprised me. My body was going through so much, and it wore down my mental health. I became depressed and anxious, and I really struggled. That was unexpected, and it gave me a new understanding of what it truly means to walk through this journey.
What helped me through those hard days was the incredible support of my friends, family, and community. They rallied around me and my family, becoming the light in our darkness, and the spark that lit what is now B the Light.
There were so many beautiful acts of kindness that still stay with me. Cards from friends and family near and far, a meal train set up for us, random flower deliveries on difficult days, and friends who came to chemo with me. Ten years later, I still open the “chemo box” occasionally and take a trip down memory lane. So many special people made that time bearable, and I am eternally grateful.
One moment that changed my life forever was when the New Ulm Medical Center staff paired me up to do chemo on the same day as another newly diagnosed woman my age, Chiloe. That shared journey instantly bonded us, and she is still one of my closest, dearest friends.
Throughout it all, my faith carried me. On my darkest days during treatment, even when I was suffering mentally and physically, I prayed for God to use my story for good. I believed there had to be something more to come from this. Watching B the Light grow over the years and now helping hundreds of women on their dark days reminds me that God’s plan is always bigger and better than ours.
Now, ten years cancer-free, life feels full circle. I love attending B the Light events, meeting other survivors, and witnessing how women connect and support one another. It’s healing for me, even all these years later, to sit and listen to other survivors as they share the same struggles I once experienced. We nod together in understanding, and that shared support is powerful.
Being a survivor means appreciating life and health in a way you never did before. It means resilience, bravery, and fighting forward, even on the awful days. It’s learning to find joy and gratitude wherever you can.
It has also changed how I see life. There is always light in the darkness; you just have to find it. And as Aunt B, the inspiration behind B the Light, wrote: NEVER give up Hope.
For those newly diagnosed, I always say, get connected to B the Light as soon as you can. It may feel intimidating to attend your first program, but once you’re there, you’ll be forever changed by a group of women who “just get it.” You are not alone. We are here to walk with you wherever you are in your journey.
And most importantly, NEVER give up Hope. Aunt B lived 13 years with Metastatic Breast Cancer and had that handwritten message - Never give up Hope - on her fridge. She saw it every day, and now it inspires so many others around the world. It is an important message for us all.
Finally, thank you for supporting our mission by purchasing a calendar. Every dollar goes directly to helping survivors, and we are so very grateful.