Brenda (October)
Disbelief. That’s the first word that comes to mind when I think back to the path through diagnosis. After all the preventative care and testing, I was surprised to find myself in this place. I wasn’t alone; my husband stood firmly beside me. He listened, supported, and reassured me that we’d face this together. I knew we would get through this chapter; I was just naive about how long it would take and that there would be a new normal.
In those early days, I surprised myself with how calm I remained. Although I had my moments of tears and fears, I continually reminded myself that allowing worry in wouldn’t change the outcome. Whatever lay ahead, I was confident I could handle it.
One of the most powerful tools in my healing came from simply telling my story. Sharing updates through CaringBridge allowed me to process what I was going through in real time. It was restorative, and it helped me feel connected to those supporting me. I turned off my text read receipts and notifications, which was another important shift in my otherwise busy life. This provided me with the space to respond on my time, not everyone else's. That small boundary created peace. I also kept a picture of myself after running my half-marathon PR (personal record) in my bathroom. That image became a daily reminder of my strength; an anchor to push me to rise above the breast cancer, survive, and be a winner.
And then, the overwhelming outpouring of support and kindness. There are no words. I’ll never forget the love I received after my first CaringBridge post. We were out of town, and when we returned home, there were gifts on the doorstep and offers of help pouring in from every direction. I felt so grateful for those who joined my fight.
Now, there are days when I feel “normal” again, like life before cancer. It’s amazing, though how quickly one small thing can pull you right back into the worry of recurrence. Still, I’m so grateful to be on the other side. Thanks to Survival Fitness through B the Light, I’m back at the gym twice a week with other survivors doing strength training and rebuilding my confidence, both physically and emotionally.
This experience has shifted my perspective on life in powerful ways. I’ve learned to let go of things more easily, to not let the little stuff weigh me down. I prioritize rest and time with the people I love. I’ve learned to say no more often, and yes to the things that truly fill me up.
Being a survivor is one of my greatest accomplishments. It’s proof that I rose to the challenge in front of me and kept going. It means facing every day with hope, and it also means turning around and offering a hand to those who come after me. Stronger together.
What I wish more people knew is that the hardest part comes after. In the middle of treatment, the focus is on medical logistics, appointments, and checklists. You’re surrounded by support. When it ends, you pause, look around, and think, “What just hit me?” That’s when the emotional weight really sets in, when you finally start to process all you’ve been through. You’re changed, physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. Your relationships have changed. It’s overwhelming. And then you consider – what’s next for me?
To anyone just diagnosed, I would say: stay positive, be selfish, and reach out for help. Friends, family, and strangers are going to be there for you. There are more resources available than you realize. Use them. Lean on people. And know that you will get through this, even if it takes longer than you expect.
B the Light entered my life at a time when I didn’t even realize I needed that kind of support. And then suddenly, I found people who got it, who understood exactly what I was feeling. For the first time, I no longer felt alone.